I’ve been a picky eater pretty much my entire life. One time, about a year ago, I made a list of the food items I would consume, and it consisted of 37 things. Yea, I was THAT kid.
Something I’ve also been for most of my life is stubborn. I like things done a certain way, I tend to be very set in my ways, and I definitely have an opinion about certain things that I’m just not willing to budge on.
However, about a month ago I came to a realization that I did not like this about myself. The reason why I am such a picky eater is because I am such a stubborn person. And well, the Lord has been urging me to consider my stubbornness and why I am not open to new things.
Upon searching deep into myself, I realized that if I am being so stubborn about something as trivial as trying new foods, something that will never really cause me harm [unless I was allergic] then what else was I being stubborn about? How else was this way of thinking causing me to miss out on the life God has for me? In what ways has God been trying to mold me into His image that my stubbornness/unwillingness to change has caused me to miss out?
So, after a lot of digging my heels in the ground this spring break I decided that I was going to eat whatever was put in front of me. No matter what! Old biases, memories, or psychological fears were thrown out! I went in with an attitude that whatever I ate, no matter if I remember it being gross, was going to be good.
So, what do you think I had to eat for dinner the first night? Black bean soup, Mexican style (meaning it was basically mushed up black beans with cheese on top.) Now, I would be a liar if I said I went in to eating this with an excited mindset…because I didn’t. However, after giving myself a pep talk, I got up enough courage to try at least a spoon full, and what do you know? Beans are good! My lanta, I have been so afraid to try beans because they look like deer turds, and well, I was tricked once by my brothers into eating real deer poop, and so I’ve been mentally scarred for most of my life. However, when I tried them, they actually tasted good. So for the rest of the week I ate whatever was made, without complain, and a very open mind, something I have never done before with food.
I won’t bore you with stories of all the other things I ate last week, but here’s a list:
Jelly fish [seriously! It surprisingly wasn’t awful either!]
I’m sure there were some other things, but these I know that I have had previous bias against, and for me to try them speaks volumes!
Through this entire week I have realized a few things. (1) Food, other than what I am used to eating, is actually pretty good, and it really won’t make me sick [however, some of the sushi did make me gag…Seriously? Raw fish texture = disgusting…] (2) When I put my mind to something, I can change. [I guess this goes along with the whole stubbornness aspect of myself] and (3) God can break down the hardest of hearts, and sometimes it comes in the form of a picky eater, who is stubborn beyond reason, but decides that she is going to seek after the Lord with reckless abandonment and that might mean trying new foods.
I’m definitely still stubborn, but after seeing myself eat foods I have literally sworn I never would, I know that the Lord is going to be doing great things in my life. I just need to keep surrendering myself for more of Him.
Where are you being stubborn in your life? How has the Lord been trying to grow you lately?
P.S. what other foods should I try…any suggestions?